Is Your “Self Talk” Track Derailing You?

Outmoded Self TalkHave you ever been in a situation where you experienced that sick feeling in your stomach or anger rising up or a sense of panic or just plain frustration…feelings that caused you to react in a way you wished you hadn’t ? Afterwards, when you thought about it, did you berate yourself for not being more resourceful this time? You’re not alone. It happens to most successful leaders at some time.

Despite your professional success, it could be any number of situations that affect you……demonstrating professional presence in senior level meetings, handling criticism or conflict, giving presentations, defending what you believe, handling customer complaints, dealing with troublesome employees, or other situations.

What is your reaction? Do you clam up? Get red in the face? Stonewall? Get defensive and accusatory? “Hum and Haw”?

You may be responding to your outmoded “self talk”.

Your outmoded “self talk” can be limiting your effectiveness, destroying your relationships, tarnishing your personal brand, and derailing your career.

Not to mention:
Causing you stress and anxiety.
Making you over react or hold back.
Questioning your abilities or self worth.

We all do it. We talk to ourselves. It can be good “self talk” or it can be negative “self talk”. If you think about it, you know in what circumstances your detrimental “self talk” happens.

Recognize any of these?

These come from a prior experience in our lives, even from our childhood, that we have reinforced over time, so now we just accept them. “Self Talk” like these will cause you to react in a less than optimal or resourceful way…maybe even damaging way.

“I am not as good as they think I am.”
“They are going to see my weaknesses”
“I better not ask that or they will think I am incompetent. Just stay quiet”
” I am just not good on my feet”
” You’re attacking me! You’re saying I’m incompetent. I need to defend myself.”
“Everybody is waiting for me to make a mistake up here.”
“Wow he’s really mad. I better just shut up rather than antagonize him even more.”
“They don’t respect me.”
“Oh no! There goes my career!”
” I hate that woman. She thinks she’s so great. She’s not that good. She just sucks up to the boss.”
“He’s just incompetent.”
“I just know he’s going to ask me questions I don’t know the answers to.”
“I am gong to look weak in front of everyone.”
“I’m the boss. Do as I say not as I do.”
“This project is off track. There goes the quarter. I am going to look really bad. There goes my bonus.”
“Don’t make yourself look like a fool.”

But You Can Change! A Lesson From Golf

A few years back, when I got really upset with myself over an another “errant” golf shot my buddy said: “Would you let your caddy talk to you the way you talk to yourself?”
btw “Errant”…. that is short form for ” Who’d had thought it possible to hit a golf ball into that spot from here?”

An easy going good friend of mine says he stays calm ” because he’s just not a good enough golfer to get upset”.

After several hours thinking about this at the 19th hole, I came to the conclusion that 2 things caused my reaction:

1. I was going to fail! All I could think about was missing my goal of a low score. With each bad shot I could see my chances going down the tubes. And I was running out of holes to recover! Of course this caused me to get even more tense, hit more bad shots and get more upset…a vicious circle…and I do mean vicious.

2. I am incompetent! (and every one can see that I am!) How many times had I hit this shot perfectly on the practice facility? Why couldn’t I do it on the course where it mattered ? What is wrong with me? It made me feel ineffective, out of control, that I was lacking the mental toughness. Sometimes I even believed it was hopeless to even think I could get better.

I have since changed my approach. I had read that nothing we experience has meaning until we give it one. That meant I could change how I gave meaning to my errant shots. I began treating each “less-than-perfect” shot as feedback…not a catastrophe.

I now tell myself 2 positive things:

1.Something good about the situation. “Well at least I will be closer to the green now.” or ” It could have been worse. At least I can find it and hit it”

2. A learning point or suggestion. “Next time I am going to remember to line up and focus on a mark on the ground in front of me” or ” remember to follow through”.

It’s All About Choice

Getting upset with myself made me feel and play worse not better.
I decided I wanted to enjoy my experience. I chose to change my “self talk”
It is amazing how this has changed not only my enjoyment of the game but also the quality of my game.
Now I am less tense. I am more relaxed. My mind is focused on what I can do different. I am not focused on what might go wrong. I am not wasting my mental energy beating myself up. I am not my own enemy. I am open to possibilities. I am more fun to golf with.

It is not easy. I will still lose it occasionally. But it comes easier now.

Applying Intentional “Self Talk” at Work



Now take this to the work place to those situations that you do not handle well or which you avoid.
Think about one of these situations.
What is the trigger that causes you to not respond in the most resourceful way?
What do you tell yourself?
What causes that feeling in the pit of your stomach or causes your mouth to go dry or makes your blood boil?
In each instance, some trigger is causing you to tell yourself to act in a specific manner…defensive, hesitant, passive, over bearing, dismissive, cautious….

Your reaction is based on old habits that are no longer serving you well. You might have learned them as a kid because they worked for you back in the day. Or they may even be habits that got you to where you are today but are now outdated.

Start to notice when you react in a manner that is different than what you want. Notice the triggers. Notice the story you are telling yourself about the other person or about yourself. You will discover which stories need updating.

Intentionally tell yourself the stories that will serve you better.

Now you can rewrite how you want to react. Think of a situation coming up. Get yourself ready for it. What is the “self talk” that will help you respond and react more resourcefully and get positive results? Practice your new “self talk” for this interaction. Afterward notice what worked and what you need to improve on. (feedback)

It doesn’t come easy. But you have choice. You can take control or choose to be a victim.

You know that if you continue to practice intentional “self talk” it will get easier and you will get better results, be less stressed and be more successful.

Later we will discuss other intentional “self talk” opportunities.

Get Out Of The Weeds Or You May Get Wacked

I was surfing for some information the other night. I found what I was looking for in about 3 minutes. One hour later I was reading some article on training porpoises. How I got there I don’t know!… Actually I do. Threads from the first article kept leading me to other interesting articles until I landed on porpoises.

I recall similar experiences at work. It happened when I got involved in reviewing marketing and sales programs with my staff. Before I knew it I was right into the middle of designing the program…maybe even writing copy! It was more interesting and fun than dealing with some employee performance issue or customer complaint.

Ever Have This Happen To You?

Most executives I work with in my coaching business have some areas in which they invariably get caught up in the details of a situation rather than providing leadership. They take on responsibility for a task that really belongs to one of their people. It’s easy to get caught in the weeds. We all do it from time to time. When you are not providing the right level of leadership to your organization or you are doing some one’s role, you are not leading at your level. You know it. They know it. Others see it.

Whatever the reason, it is diminishing your value as an executive. It is robbing one of your people of the opportunity to learn and grow. It is adding to your workload.

You are shirking your duty. You are wasting your energy and intelligence that could be better utilized leading the organization to become more effective, more efficient and more successful…making it a high performing model.

It may be detrimental to your career.

3 Quick Tips For Leading at Your Level

  1. Write down the critical deliverable’s of your role. In a perfect world, where should you be spending your energies? A good place to start is your objectives. As a leader what is the true business value you bring to the organization in terms of its top line and bottom line? What is it that only you can do in your position that will make this team great?

    Examples are: setting vision and strategy; removing road blocks; creating a winning team culture; developing your people; motivating; staffing with the right talent; dealing with non performers.

  2. Be aware of the types of tasks, issues or opportunities that typically draw you into the details and pull you into the weeds. Think of past times when this happened. Just being aware will cause you to recognize when they arise. At first you may only notice when you are already involved. However over time you will immediately recognize the situation and take alternative actions. Be particularly vigilant in meetings in which you may dominate the discussion and drag it into the details rather than identify the deliverable and assign responsibility and accountability.
  3. Think about these situations as professional development opportunities for your employees. It will also enhance and strengthen your leadership. And free up your time to work on moving your team forward.

What Causes You To Get Bogged In The Weeds? Be Honest With Yourself.

      I have a natural ability in that area. It’s my expertise.
      So why not create other experts?
      Time is short. It’s critical. It won’t take long. I’ll just get it done.
      And what about the next time…and the next time…and the time after that?
      This is too important. I don’t trust him to do it right.
      Is there a competence issue here that you are ignoring or not acting on?
      It makes me feel good to show my expertise.
      What ego?
      She’s overloaded. I’ll just do it.
      Is this a professional development issue, resources issue or competency issue?
      I enjoy it!
      Then give up your real job.

By taking on others’ tasks or getting wrapped up in the details, what is the cost in terms of your personal productivity, leadership growth, and lost contribution to the organization?

Lead at your level.

Are Your Co-Workers Killing You?

Unfriendly, non-supportive or toxic co-workers can not only make your business life unpleasant and reduce productivity, they can reduce how long you live. A new study found that workers who felt they had strong supportive relationships with their peers at work seemed to live longer than those who didn’t. Co-workers who were friendly and helpful in solving issues contributed to this positive feeling.

Interestingly, whether the boss was supportive or not didn’t seem to have the same impact on a worker’s mortality.

Just Another Reason For Creating A Positive Team Environment

  • Besides the powerful impact it can have on your life span, obnoxious or poor peer relationships can impact business productivity and the bottom line.
  • Studies have shown that focusing solely on productivity leads to burn out, higher churn rates, isolation, sub-optimization, and eventually lower productivity.
  • It has been shown that organizations that build stronger relationships among their constituents create powerful ongoing improvements in planning, responding, and reacting to competitive and business issues. Trust, respect and constructive interaction are just some of the characteristics of successful teams
  • Toxic behaviors that are allowed to exist destroy good will, trust and respect. Many times, individual workers (at all levels) do not admit if they are uncomfortable with this behavior for fear of being seen as weak, not fitting in, or too sensitive. However, it is costing the company heavily in lost productivity and employee turnover…not to mention potential lawsuits. Toxic behaviors include name calling, sarcasm, back biting, stonewalling, exclusion, cliques, and inappropriate language.

What Are You Going To Do About It? Today?

Here are a few suggestions:

  • Be aware. Look for the signs and behaviors.
  • Notice where you may be exhibiting some toxic behaviors: sarcasm, inappropriate jokes, put downs, silent treatment, ranting, etc
  • Have an open and frank discussion at your next management meeting. Ask HR to facilitate.
  • Survey your employees.
  • Create a simple code of conduct.
  • It might be a good time to review your organization culture. You may want to convene an off-site workshop to review and update what this organization is all about, and how as a team you can make a powerful impact on the working lives and productivity of your employees.

    The Study

    Kate Lunau in Maclean’s Magazine in Canada wrote about this new study from Tel Aviv University that was published in Health Psychology (a journal of American Psychology Association).

    • 820 workers were tracked from 1988 to 2008
    • From some of Israel’s largest companies including finance, public utilities and manufacturing
    • They worked an average of 8.8 hours a day
    • One third were women
    • 80 % were married with kids

Does Your Team Mirror Need Changing?

We See What We Want To SeeRemember those mirrors at the funhouse? You’d stand in front of them and see yourself in all kinds of goofy configurations:elongated, really fat, small head bloated body-(OMG I must have one of those in my bathroom!) and as you moved you’d see your body image change. At hockey games these days they do the “bubble camera ” by taking a shot of a fan and distorting their image. Fun stuff.

Not So Fun In The Office Though

Your leadership team is the model that the organization emulates. Like it or not, how you act and react as a team, is interpreted through your employees’ filters…their eyes, their ears, their feelings.

You may say that the leadership team acts as one and supports each other. However, if there is back biting or finger pointing or self promotion then your message is negated. In fact, it erodes your position and credibility.


“How can we believe you and this team when we see how you actually behave?”

    • “You preach to us about team work and working together.
      Yet we observe your leadership team saying the right words in public but something different in one-on-one’s or staff meetings.”
      “You talk about respect and trust.
      Yet we don’t see this team demonstrating it when things go awry. “
      “You ask us to sacrifice our time and compensation for the good of the company.
      Yet we see your team spending company time and money on non essential perks.”
      (And you say, “Yes, but we have a lot of responsibility on our shoulders.”)
      “You talk about being optimistic and forward looking.
      Yet we don’t understand the direction we are going, how we are going to get there, and our own roles and responsibilities in helping us get there.”
  • Maybe It’s Time To Look In The Mirror

    Actually, it may be time to change the mirror. It may be distorting your view of reality. What you think your team is doing may be diametrically opposite to what others think. This difference is costing you dearly in financial results not to mention employee productivity and morale. (oops, I guess I did mention it)

    Research shows that employees’ behavior and culture reflects that of their leaders. It is not “do as I say” but “do as I do”. I remember years ago a GM took over a manufacturing division. He had a habit of using the “F” word as part of his normal every day language. I visited one of his directors about 3 months later. It was amazing how the management team, by osmosis, had let the “F” word infiltrate their language. In fact even the director’s administrative assistant would occasionally drop the “F” bomb unintentionally. (“Here’s your F***ing report”)

    While your situation most likely is not this bad, the negative business impact could be worse. Are you ignoring the effect your team’s behaviors are having on the whole organization?

    Better Now Than Later

    Do something now. Take an honest view of the behaviors of your team as a whole and as individual leaders. Are you acting true to your values? Have you as a team reviewed your organization’s culture and decided what you want it to be or have you just accepted “the way things are done around here”. If so, you are shirking your responsibility as a leader.
    You are letting your employees down. You are not achieving the results you could attain.

    Not to mention, you are leaving money on the table. (There I go again!)

    You might even want to think about having an off-site meeting to come to grips with your team culture and vision. In fact, you may even want to engage a professional facilitator to make sure all voices are heard and you can focus on getting the most out of the session.

    If as a leadership team, you are not all in agreement with how you want to be as a team and as an organization,then how will anyone else know?

    You reap what you sow.

    4 Things You Need To Tell Your Boss Monthly

    The business world is moving faster than ever. It is more ambiguous. Knowledge has an ever shortening shelf life. Information changes in a nanosecond.

    How often I would get caught up in my job…doing what needed to be done to exceed all expectations… putting out fires, motivating employees, creating loyal customers…bringing exceptional value to my company. So what if I didn’t keep telling my boss what I was doing or trying to suck up to him like some others? I had important things to do for the company. He knew I was working hard… doing great things. He didn’t need me to keep reminding him. Or did he?

    You need to know on a timely basis the health of critical plans and their impact on the financial results. Your boss and the board need to know. Without it they are left to creating their own opinions of how well things are going and what needs to be done… including how well you are doing your job. The health of the business depends on timely… relevant… information. Your leadership image and career depends on you providing relevant updates to your boss on a timely basis.


    The Challenge: Just the Right Amount Of The Right Information At The Right Time

    The challenge is to determine what information is important.
    Too much information is as bad as too little. Most leaders and boards don’t have time…and won’t take it… to read through pages of details or listen to drawn-out explanations. Like Sgt Friday on that old detective series Dragnet they want “Just the facts”.


    The 4 Things You Need to Tell Your Boss

    Put your self in the board’s seat. [Read more...]

    Stop Avoiding That Tough Conversation

    Most of us have had times when we know something is not right and we need to address the issue with another person head on. It could be your boss is going around you and working directly with your employees without keeping you informed or maybe behaving in ways that are undermining you. Maybe it’s a peer jockeying for your job or part of your role. It might be a subordinate who seems to be sabotaging you.

    There may be two different reactions:

    1. You notice it but shrug it off as unimportant. “That’s just the way it is.” “Hey we’re a team here.”
    2. It bothers you. You feel something is not right and it’s not good for you or your position.
      By the way, if you don’t notice anything, then take the blinkers off and pay attention to what is going on around you.

      Ignore It At Your Own Peril


      So let’s assume you do notice it and it does concern you or at a minimum peaks your interest. These kinds of issues are distracting. Without resolution they remain in the back of your mind, stealing valuable brain power. It can cause anxiety, lack of sleep, anger and even illness. Left too long it might cause you to act irrationally…blow up in a meeting, sabotage a project, complain to others behind their back, or even worse.
      Humans typically avoid unpleasant situations and if you are already loaded with work and you are doing a great job there is a tendency to put it on the “to do “ list and it never seems to make it to the top. Unfortunately it won’t go away and you may be the loser.
      The sooner you have that tough conversation with the apparently offending person, the faster you will resolve the issue and move forward…and feel better.

      Don’t Wait. Address It Head On.

      1. Step back and look at the situation from a company and business perspective. Ask what damage is this causing or how is it detracting from a smooth successful operation?
      2. Write down specifically what the issue is and very clearly the outcome you desire and what success looks like.
      3. Look at it from the other person’s perspective. Look for that person’s positive intention. What would cause a rational person to act in this manner. Many times people are driven by ignorance, fear or desire to protect themselves. (job, position, personal perception, prestige, reputation)
      4. List what possible things you may be doing to cause the issue. Are you excluding others,showing favoritism, not following up, micro-managing etc.
      5. Is the other person correct in their assessment? If so act accordingly. If not proceed.
      6. Make two columns, one for you and one for the other person.
      7. Identify the common objective that you both have. Answer the questions below as open minded as possible. This will lead you to having a fuller and clearer understanding of the situation and provide direction for a face to face meeting.
      8. Action Me Them
        The Issue How I see it How would they see it?
        Value to the business Doing it my way Doing it their way
        Personal value What does this do for me? What could it mean to them?
        Actions Observed What have I done
        to contribute to the issue?
        What actions have you observed?
        Purpose of Action Mine Theirs
        Common Objective What do we both want?
        Win Win Plan Value to me Value to them

        [Read more...]

    Dallas Mavericks Show Teamwork Works

    Teamwork Works

    Teamwork Works

    It’s another example of the power of team work. The Miami Heat with its much touted superstars-Lebron James, Dwayne Wade and Chris Bosh-were unable to win against a TEAM of one superstar Dirk Nowitzki and a group of lesser players who worked to collectively find ways to score more points and to hold Miami to fewer baskets and win the NBA championship.

    In the final game Nowitzki was not performing at his usual level. He finished 9 for 27. Even though he was 1 for 12 in the first half, the rest of the team helped make it 53-51. Throughout the game the team stepped up and and did what was needed to win.

    From ESPN Game HQ

    “When you are outnumbered 3-1 in All-Stars, its crucial your supporting cast shows up. Luckily for Dirk Nowitzki, that’s exactly what happened. In the Mavericks’ four wins, Dirk’s supporting cast combined to score over 75 points…”

    “This is a true team,” Mavs coach Rick Carlisle said. “This is an old bunch. We don’t run fast or jump high. These guys had each other’s backs. We played the right way. We trusted the pass.”

    http://sports.espn.go.com/nba/recap?gameId=310612014

    Contrasts in Mindset

    1. After the game Norwitzki praised the efforts of his teammates and how they made up for his game being off.

    2. Dwayne Wade (Miami), during an interview after one of the earlier games, made a comment about how if one of the three (him, Bosh, James) was not playing well then one of the the other three would step up their game. To me this demonstrated how this threesome viewed the team. It was all about the three of them. It appeared that the rest of the team was incidental…along for the ride. Thinking back I don’t recall the rest of the team ever being mentioned. I have to wonder the impact this had on the other players through the season and particularly in the finals.

    There Are Parallels to Leading a Business Team.

    Super stars- Whether in sports or in business they set the bar high and do the extra-ordinary things to win and energize and motivate the rest of the team. They add power to the team. However be careful not to ignore and to recognize the critical contributions of everyone else. Paying special attention to only one or two people no matter how good they are can cause morale issues.

    Complimentary Team Members- Successful teams leverage the contribution of individuals with different skill sets as well as harness the synergy and selflessness of members working in concert to deliver superior results and stepping in to support each other. It is about the team not just the individual. The competition should be out there not in here.

    A Situational Leader- It starts with a clear vision and strategy that each team member completely understands. It requires a leader who helps each member focus on executing their role as part of the team. Just as critical, a leader must have the agility to utilize the right person in the right slot as required and modify the plan to respond to real time changes in the situation. (just as Rick Carlisle did)

    Creating and maintaining a winning team is hard work. There are so many moving parts that it can not be left to chance. It needs clarity and commitment around honesty, respect, alignment, goals, strategies, conflict resolution, accountability, and communication.

    Have you taken a hard look at your team lately? Are you doing what you need to do to create and maintain a High Performing Team? Do something today before the unexpected happens and you regret it.

    Has Power Changed You For The Worst?

    Leadership Power

    Has Power Changed You?

    In an article in the Wall Street Journal Jonah Lehrer wrote about an interesting phenomenon that has been observed in businesses. A recent survey noted that most of the inappropriate behaviors such as swearing and rudeness and flirting are exhibited by those with the most authority.

    Leaders Acting Like Fools

    Lehrer quotes Dacher Keltner, a psychologist at the University of California, Berkeley, who notes: ‘It’s an incredibly inconsistent effect. When you give people power they basically start acting like fools. They flirt inappropriately, tease in a hostile fashion and become totally impulsive.” He also noted that those with lots of authority act like they lack empathy.

    Psychologists Call it the Paradox of Power.

    Lehrer wrote that “The very traits that helped leaders accumulate power in the first place all but disappear once they rise to power…they become impulsive, reckless and rude.”

    Interesting survey results. John Gottman, a relationship expert and best selling author, talks about four toxic behaviors that are lethal to relationships. One behavior that is the most poisonous of all four is Contempt because it conveys superiority, judgment, and condescension.

    Before you dismiss this because of the strong word used, take a look at what is included under this umbrella. Contempt includes sarcasm, belittling, cynicism, name calling, eye rolling, and hostile humor. In its worse forms it can include belligerence and disgust.

    Notice If It Is Present In Your Environment

    Over the next few weeks notice when some one or even you displays one or more of the above Contempt characteristics.

    Some examples are:

    • those zingers in staff meetings
    • the nick names that everyone laughs at and yet the receiving party may not really enjoy. But they say nothing because it would mean that they are not “with it” or part of the team. (unwritten rules of the office)
    • the stories that elevate the leader and reinforce the subordination of an employee
    • hostile or derogatory humor in response to a difference of opinion or action taken
    • seemingly harmless sexual connotations

    Toxins Are Like A Virus That Spreads If Left Untreated

    Toxins can creep into an organization and limit motivation and team work. It can grow and become part of the culture. It can affect who is hired and who leaves, who succeeds and who fails. It is insidious. Unless it is recognized and stopped you are letting it happen and you are contributing to a negative work environment that could be detrimental to future growth.

    And by the way, saying that “we have an open environment where anyone knows they are free to speak up if they don’t agree” is a cop-out.

    Most people display one or more of these toxins at times. It’s only human. It becomes an issue though if it is a regular mode of operating.

    As a leader it may be wise to occasionally look in the mirror and ask yourself if some times you may appear to be acting inappropriately.

    As the economy improves we will see more movement of good people who seek organizations that not only offer them professional growth but also provide a positive work environment.

    Think about it.

    Face Your Next Crisis Like a Navy Seal

    React to Crisis Like a Navy SEAL

    The recent successful heroic mission of Navy Seal Team 6, the top counter-terrorism unit, demonstrated their ability to achieve daring objectives and remain resourceful in the face of unknown obstacles. Despite unexpected issues such as the surrounding walls interfering with the helicopter operation and causing it to crash, they immediately modified their plans and completed the mission.

    Physical Capability is Only Part of the Solution

    Brutal training for a SEAL takes over 30 months to be ready for deployment. With a training drop-out rate of 80%, it was found that physical ability was not enough. A critical ingredient was mental toughness…the ability to be resourceful in the face of crisis and under extreme stress. A new program was introduced to teach self management under stress.

    The SEALs (Sea, Air and Land) whose motto is “The only easy day was yesterday” are now taught four critical mental skills. Think about applying these same principles to your next crisis or to a critical part of your business plan.

    1. Narrow Goal Setting
      This means having a clear focus on a specific near term objective such as your presentation to the board next week; over coming a client’s objections; solving a budget shortfall or making an 8 foot putt. Get clear, get specific and get focused.
    2. Visualization
      Athletes are proficient at employing visualization whether it be hitting a free throw, making a par from the sand, racing down a giant slalom, or scoring a goal in hockey. Visualizing your actions and those around you and the successful result is like a “dress” rehearsal. It prepares you mentally for the real thing. It gives you an opportunity to prepare yourself to handle potential obstacles and glitches. Whether it is a critical presentation, important client meeting or executive review, mentally walk through it in your mind several times. For yourself and the other participants. See it. Feel it. Hear it. You will de-stress the situation and prepare yourself for a successful interaction.
    3. Self Talk
      Our self talk influences our emotions and our mental agility. That old saying, “whether you think you can or can’t, you are right” is true. Both your internal mental ability and your external body language is impacted by your self talk. For example, have you ever met someone who says they are happy to see you and yet you know by their body language that they are not really happy to see you. Harness your self talk to be positive and self confident in a given situation. In order to exude warmth when meeting a room full of strangers, JFK would say to himself just before entering, “I am happy to be here and happy to meet you.”
    4. Reaction Control
      This is the ability to control your internal emotions……pounding heart, sweating palms, awful feeling in the pit of your stomach- in the face of crisis, stressful situations or unexpected problems. Inhaling and holding the air for 2-3 seconds and then expelling completely will help. Repeat a few times. Pausing to physically or mentally take a step back, lean back or push your chair back from the table will help you mentally decouple from the situation and allow you to think more resourcefully.

    Practice these 4 techniques in non stressful situations so that they will “be there” when you are facing a critical stressful situation.

    5 More Reasons You Could Use An Executive Coach

    You COuld Use An Executive Coach

    You Could Use An Executive Coach

    Here are some more semi-tongue-in-cheek one-liners on why you or someone you know could use an executive coach. Recognize anyone? Even you sometimes?

    1. If others think you graduated from the Tony Soprano School of Leadership (and even worse if you’re proud of it)…you could use a coach
    2. If you think: “I really am interested in what you are saying even though I am texting during your presentation”…you could use a coach
    3. If you ever wondered why your butt was covered with rashes and then you realize it’s from being kissed all day…you could use a coach
    4. If there is an office betting pool on what you will do today that doesn’t match what you say…then you could use a coach
    5. If nothing seems to get done right without you being involved…you could use a coach